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Premium

There’s no good health without good fortune. Flaunt yours, with Premium—the ultimate in healthcare statuswear!

Premium is an 18k gold-plated sterling silver hospital bracelet that lets everyone know “you’re better.” Because universal accessibility would be fascist, Premium is made-to-order! Yours now for only $7,911, the average yearly cost for single coverage health insurance in America.

Laughter is for poor people—medicine is the best medicine! Get Premium!

  • Size frail

  • 2.5" x 2.5" x 1"

  • 18k gold-plated sterling silver

  • Proceeds help us pay for more dog vitamins

Kickback
NYC

Activists and collaborators: contact us for partnership opportunities.

Get your koozies now!

Robe & Slippers not for sale.

  • Made in the USA, baby

  • *Not tested for effectiveness

Cûf

Limited quantities available—order now!
*Please allow approx. 2 weeks shipping time.

  • Stainless steel plated in rose gold, 18k gold, or platinum

  • Compatible with iPhone® 13 Pro

  • The iPhone® 13 Pro is a trademark of Apple Inc., registered in the U.S. and other countries and is not associated with Mother Goods

Lullabombs
Alternate Buy Options
Donate

All proceeds go to War Child, an organization dedicated to making sure no child has to hear the sounds of war again.

Sold out? Good. In the UK text 'SAFE' to 70123 to donate £10

Each LullaBombs device starts at £449.00 with additional charges:

Privilege Fee: £1,001
Lucky Tax: £617
Safety Surcharge: £384

Total Price: £2,500.00

If shipping outside the UK, please contact info@mother-goods.com

  • Comes in 6 different wars

  • Housed in an inert landmine

  • 3 modes of authentic war sounds

  • Immersive explosion nightlight

Gay Russian Dolls
LDN
Blood is Blood
NYC

Limited quantities available. Order now with free shipping!

  • 100% Cotton

  • Printed with the blood of gay men

  • Regular fit